~ Day 17 ~ Unwanted Diagnosis

Nothing prepares you to hear those words.....YOU HAVE CANCER. I've heard bad news before but somehow was always prepared for the news. Usually it was because it was more of the same. However, that day in August when they discovered the first mass was like no other. Cancer is scary, it's the monster everyone fears. But as soon as that news came it was gone....poof! I had surgery to remove it 3 days later. No time to process, no time for anything to sink in. I, in my eyes, was not a cancer survivor. I was merely someone who had cancer all of three days, almost feeling guilty that I had cancer at all because it was so easy. I went about my merry way. It wasn't until my follow-up scan in December that the world as I knew it had changed forever. YOUR CANCER IS BACK. This time it wouldn't be a 3 day turnaround, no picnic, no walk in the park. Now I am in the fight for my life. No one prepares you for the conversations that follow with your doctor. Mortality rate, targeted therapies, clinical trials, life expectancy, side effects, transplant, stages, lifestyle changes, recurrent cancer, and my favorite, quality vs. quantity of life. I am 40 years old with two beautiful sons. My only concern is being here for them.....for a long time. This unwanted diagnosis will just be a part of our journey, not the end.
~ still climbing mountains ~